We all want everything. We all have unbound wishes that have the power to swim the whole universe through the mysterious ether, meet the God and then come back. We all see dreams through our eyes, open or close. These dreams, beautiful and alive, give us joy and reason to live another day as the day treads forward like… yesterday.
Many of us try to get what we want. We succeed, sometimes we fail. In fact even the most successful man in this world might not have a record of more than 60% success. What happens to the rest 40%? The failure. The unsuccess. The F-grade.
It is accepted, is named compromise and is lived with. All of us compromise in life. It is natural, so natural in fact that in nature it is called adapting. To the surrounding, to changes- good or bad. I am not writing this to vent out that compromises are bad and a sign of weakness or something like that. I do not believe that. In fact some compromises are so big that a person who has to compromise becomes a bigger man.
Then there are occasions when we have no option but to compromise. Like when death takes away the person we loved so much. Who’s fault is it? Mine, hers or God’s? Whom should we question? We can not ask this anyone but compromise. So is what everyone does. But this does not make us weak or something. In fact, here weakness will be to break-down.
Similarly, what if we love someone whom we propose and she rejects. Again, who is a bigger man? One who accepts the bitter truth, swallow the pill and looks ahead or one who is not able to accept this truth and try to force the girl to be with him.
These are all what I shall call ‘Good compromises’. They need to be done. They are painful, hurtful and one which I wish happen to nobody though knowing that these will happen to everybody at some point or the other.
If these are ‘good compromises’ then there ought to be the ‘bad’ ones as well. The world after all is made of symmetry, if nothing else.
To be honest I can only give you examples of the bad compromises. The boundary between the two is a thin one. No one can say when we slipped from one and into the other.
For example, not getting qualified for JEE one compromises with a regional college- a good compromise. After studying, doing an average job, hating it but making peace with it- a bad compromise. These was a pretty blunt example but the contrast can always be lessened. OK.. tell me this.. In the earlier example of a girl rejecting the boy. If you would have been in place of the boy, will you again ask the girl after sometime or accept this. I mean what is better- to compromise or to retry. Should the girl be bothered again?
Maybe she should. I mean what is the harm. So let me bring this in greyer area. What if this girl is proposed by another guy whom she says yes, but you know that he is not good for her? Dilemma huh..
Let me ask another question. What if you start liking your best friend’s ex-girlfriend? This isn’t cool, is it?
What if you and your brother or sister want something different but there can be only one thing in the house, whatever be the reason? Who should compromise? The answer to this question by generations of living is- the elder one should. This is a rule of thumb followed everywhere. But this is as questionable as any rule of thumb.
Anyways the point is that there are too many grey areas in the compromise business to say that one should compromise with something or not.
Now, you all must be thinking why I have written this whole essay. I do not have answer to this question but another question. How do you all decide when to compromise and when to well… go ahead and give it a second or third or fourth or.. and so on try?
Who tells you when to quit and compromise?